09 February 2006

quick post, as it is bedtime (hopefully)

Is it just me, or do you find that - for lack of a better phrase - we here in America are afraid to "reach out and touch someone"?

I am so used to touchy-feely types of people: my family is very much a family that shows affection through pats (dad) and hugs (mom), etc. A majority of my close friends from home (Ty, Katie, etc) are very touchy-feely, as well. And another dear friend will punch (lightly) in the arm as a sign of affection.

All this to say, is that I realized how *foreign* it is - if you are in my demographic of the working 20- or 30-something, unmarried, urbanites - to have daily, human, physical contact. I was struck by this in a few ways over the last week:

1. I hugged my friend AW at work, because she was having a horrible Monday. And I like to give hugs, but I almost checked myself, in my head saying "is this weird...to be hugging in an office?" No, was the conclusion I came to. It's not!

2. Whenever I go get my hair done, I relish when the time comes for C to wash my hair. She washes it and massages my head. AH Heaven! Seriously, just melts the stress away.

3. If I'm with DGS, just holding hands = fabulous!

4. My friend Tamra used to always say that "A person needs 7 affectionate touches a day to stay happy and healthy". And she would walk around SFCM giving hugs, squeezing shoulders, hands, whatever. All in promotion of this maxim. And you know what? I think she's right!

Babies need affection - they need to be held, and not neglected. It affects their behavior and development. I think as adults, we feel we grow out of that need. But really, I don't think so. I always notice after a trip home or something just how much of that lacks on an everyday basis.

Interesting . . . hmmmmmmmm

2 comments:

math jedi said...

interesting thought. I agree. Not really sure what to do about it though... if I just went up and hugged people, I'd be labeled as some kind of stalker or sexual harasser or something.

Sandra Vahtel said...

interesting indeed. I've heard about the "seven touches" thing before. I think I might actually try that to people...