what else would you use a search engine for, anyway?

aka "Life according to google" as shamelessly borrowed from Wyld.

Using Google, type in the following and choose the first result to pop up.
(I used my real first name in the search).

1. [your name] needs:
MezzoSF needs rescue to get out alive.

2. [your name] looks like:
MezzoSF looks like Shania twain there.

3. [your name] does:
MezzoSF does it while baking a cake.

4. [your name] hates:
MezzoSF hates her life.

5. [your name] goes:
MezzoSF goes air guitar on the vaccuum.

6. [your name] loves:
MezzoSF loves it radio.

7. [your name] eats:
MezzoSF eats spinach, peas & basil!

8. [your name] has:
MezzoSF has talent and will grow into the woman and artist God intends her to be.

9. [your name] won't:
MezzoSF won't be immune to something like this.

10. [your name] can't:
MezzoSF can't rock just yet because she's a raw talent and not yet coherent in theme.

11. [your name] wants:
MezzoSF wants to become a successful and talented singer, songwriter, and performer.

12. [your name] makes:
MezzoSF makes something most foul, yet she thinks it's sooooo funny!

13. [your name] killed:
MezzoSF killed her dad and then committed suicide, so why bother to watch?