snippet

Me: "Hey, Dad - how'd you get that odd little bruise in the center of your thumb?"

Dad: "Oh, this? From work the other day."

Me: "Work? Weird. How'd you do that? It's such an odd spot for a bruise . . ."

Dad: "The power switch on our linear accelerator was broken, so everything had to be done manually, and the manual switch sticks. Switching it back and forth hundreds of times throughout the day caused the bruise."

Me: "So. What you're saying is that your injury was caused by a linear accelerator?"

Dad: "Well, yeah."

Me: "You are the only person I know who would ever be able to utter the sentance, 'I bruised my thumb with the linear accelerator.' That is pretty awesome. And funny."

snippets of table talk

"Well guess what *I* just got? A workout tape. Richard Simmons: Sweatin' to the Oldies!"

"I remember when you used to smoke. For like a week."
"They were menthols...oooh ya'll they were NASty."

"I smoked a cigar once. And didn't know you weren't supposed to inhale. I was very sick."

"That guy's hairdo is . . . strange . . . he needs to lose it."

"Ooh. Ya'll. Let's figure out where we goin' to eat all weekend. And when we can go get us some chocolate!